The Seven Pitfalls of Single Parenting

Today, among the glut of single parenting self-help books, it's delightful to discover one that not only presents exactly what the title offers, but exceeds all expectations with new insight, realistic advice and success strategies to guide readers through the maze of post-divorce parenthood that helps parents and children not merely survive, but thrive. The book is The 7 Pitfalls of Single Parenting: What to Avoid to Help Your Children Thrive After Divorce by Carolyn Ellis.

Best-selling author, Carolyn Ellis, has combined her academic background, broad based professional experience and personal understanding with divorce and single parenthood to create the definitive book every single-parent should read as a practical parenting guide. The book is based on in-depth research and examination of real life experiences from clients, single parents, seminar students and her own invaluable experience of raising three young children after divorce.

This is the guidebook she wished she'd had herself as she tirelessly searched for an all-inclusive post divorce reference book that simply did not exist. What makes this book so compelling is that she has made many of these same mistakes and writes about them so others can easily understand and save themselves needless pain and concern.

Divorce is an enormous life transition that presents numerous challenges emotionally, physically, financially and socially; no one has any education or is completely prepared for it, including the consequences, which includes single parenthood. There are many assumptions that parenting will be the least of the concerns after a divorce, but in fact there are many aspects that can blindside even the most intentional parents. Issues such as otherwise responsible parents putting their kids in the crossfire of their anger, conflicting parenting styles, transitioning worries, financial stress and mental and physical exhaustion can strain the best of parents and result in lack of confidence and making inevitable mistakes.

Even as parents reach out to well-meaning family and friends or seek out the latest self help book, single parenting can be a challenge as parents desperately attempt to create a safe, secure and "normal" environment for their children. The 7 Pitfalls provides an all-inclusive guide by detailing things to avoid and is written from a positive, proactive stance starting with the THRIVE principles. These basic concepts configured in an acronym to convey a sense of inspiration, hope and success: Trust, Honesty, Responsibility, Integrity, Vision and Expression.

The book is organized around the 7 Common Pitfalls under separate chapter headings that describe the traps, how to recognize them, and how to avoid them: Not Having a Big Picture, Getting Hooked by Your Ex Spouse, Parenting from Guilt, Going for the Martyr Medal, Not Putting your Children First, Being Responsible for Your Children's Relationship with Your Ex, and Living in Chaos.

Each chapter concludes with action steps and accountability checks to ensure the practical application of this important information. One of the most effective tools is the Action Tracker that helps keep track of accomplishments with a real measure of progress and growth.

If any of these issues or descriptions resonate with you then this is the book for you because it can assist you choose to thrive after divorce and bypass the behaviors that hold single parents down from raising healthy, self-confident, capable children. It's good for you and great for your kids.