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Titled: Can't You Be More Like Me? Get the Coaching category RSS Feed

Can't You Be More Like Me?

Article Summary: Having everyone be just like you are would get boring eventually. Besides, the differences in people are great opportunities to learn. Without differences, you'd miss out on a lot.

There isn't an individual alive who still has faults despite the wonderfulness they have already unfolded and proven themselves luminous. In fact, some of you out there are convinced we'd all be better off if we acted more as you, right?

You may catch yourself saying: "If only (name) were more decisive or clear-headed, or realistic, or patient like me, life would be so much easier. Our team would be far more effective. We'd make it through this project/these meetings with lightening speed."

There is great learning in associating with people who are not like you. It can make your life far more interesting and it surely can make you reach for the next good thing. As enticing as it may seem to live and work with others that communicate like you, in time, it would get quite boring. Here's what you'd miss:

Optimist vs. The Realist: Both of these personality types need each other. Cynics think of themselves as realistic.' Perhaps it sounds more optimistic? Either way, our world has too many shades of grey to lock our thinking into any one category. As an optimist, it is easy to get instantly irritated at negative or 'realistic' viewpoints, though these views are often just what I need to stretch me into seeing the full picture and to making important decisions accordingly. A realistic individual can unfold past their current belief system if they'll listen to new, positive ideas because it will make them stretch. The key to both styles is to be open, to listen, and to be curious.

Urgent vs. The Patient One: Both of these personalities drive each other nuts, yet are great for one another. The pressure caused by impatience in management makes people perform at a much lower level of effectiveness, which is just the opposite of what they suppose. Oftentimes, you immobilize your people who fear that they are not acting fast enough. Mistakes are made; morale decreases. Be discerning and use urgency as a tool, not a standard mode of behavior. Patient ones have learned this and yet they benefit from being discerning as well. Sometimes urgency is needed. You have to know when to use patience and when to be incisive and make decisions to move forward.

Visionary vs. Detail-Oriented: Another way to look at this category is the creative vs. the naysayer. Leaders who easily look at the larger picture, see possibilities that others can't envision. You encourage fresh approaches and generate enthusiasm. The key for both of these valuable leaders is to listen, simply listen, to one another. Perhaps the entire vision won't work, but it will stretch others beyond where they were before. If the naysayer cuts this vision down prematurely, it stunts creativity. At the same time, the naysayer may have valid points to help from this vision and keep the company out of bankruptcy. The company needs both of these types to help it to succeed.

You may have seen yourself in one of the above broad categorizations. If you really want to have fun, switch hats in your next meeting. If you are typically the realist, try being an optimist. See how this stretches you. Enjoy the shock on your team members faces when they notice this role reversal.

All that any of us want in life is to enjoy it more and experience higher levels of success across the board.

This week, simply notice where you hold too tightly to your familiar role. How does this block your success? Stretch out of it. Even a little stretch may bring noticeable results. When you see yourself hoping others become more like you, change your thoughts to 'perhaps I could change toward the way they are?' Enjoy your discoveries and have a phenomenal week.

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About the Author:
Ann Golden Egle
For the sake of keeping your career fresh and on track, would you like to enjoy a weekly shot-in-the-arm from Master Certified Coach Ann Golden Eglé? You can sign up for her Success Thought of the Week at http://www.gvsuccesscoaching.com .